Funniest thing you read today

Glenn Beck is Planning a $2 Billion Libertarian Commune in Texas

In this world, human life has no value: squirrels run free and are feted with the ever-diminished crop yields, while humans are interned in highly regulated compounds (FEMA camps, anyone?) and must work endless hours, sustaining themselves only on tasteless “nourishment cubes.

Gove started with a statement of sympathy for Jade Goody and the way in which she was an object of derision for her general lack of knowledge. Of course he then promptly blames the comprehensive education system for her failings, claiming that if only she had been taught "properly" then she wouldn't have been so stupid. Using Gramsci he maintains that a proper grounding in the basics is missing from the structures of contemporary education and that this lack is failing working class children.

12. The satanists' "satanic power", "magical formulæ", "number magic", are just confused fantasies, and of course in no way influence our policy - as we don't believe in such 'psychological' and 'hypnotic' humbug. However although fantasy, based on pure superstition, it may affect the actions of people that believe in such nonsens via psychological ruling, similar to wich-doctors and woo-doo priests, i.e. an authoritarian tendency. Thus, as mentioned, anarchists take a clear stand against satanism in real terms of all forms and shapes

We welcome debate. We face a number of serious political challenges in the months ahead that will necessitate further discussion, and if the level of struggle rises, as we hope it will, we will need a lot more. But over the specific issues arising from the recent disputes committee, we feel that the special conference must mark the end of a period in which that debate has consumed most of the party’s attention.

In the 20th Century, the two social movements that harassed shopkeepers to distraction were the mafia in the USA and the German national socialists, but now the perverse anarchists of the AF seem to have taken a leaf out of their book.

Simon Danczuk from Rochdale with his Cyril Smith revelations, Andy Newman from Swindon in highlighting the SWP's misdemeanours, and Barry Woodling in affirming the rights of a free press, are all fighting on the side of political decency

...but this made me laugh.

Ethos wrote:

...but this made me laugh.

I couldn't even watch that beyond the first 20 or so seconds. It was hilarious but also seriously cringe inducing.

In keeping with the theme of "Members of major right-wing party in the U.S. say the darndest things", here's the latest.

http://thinkprogress.org/justice/2013/03/29/1793271/don-young-latino-wetbacks/

I have brought it BACK FROM THE DEAD

I have brought it BACK FROM THE DEAD

Just stumbled across this:
http://www.messagesfromspiritworld.info/MoreMessages/Communist/Communist%20Leaders5.html

What is this, I don't even. Was looking for stuff by Kozo Uno and what I get is this? Internet is trolling me

Karl Marx
...
I attended here to confirm that I, Marx, affirm God's existence and that He is the Parent of all humankind. I denied God and shouted loudly with confidence to the extent that people believed me more than God. Now I'd like to reveal my experience with God to the whole world. I met Dr. Lee for the first time in the spirit world and was very attracted by having several talks about theory with him.

I felt that my theoretical paradigm was crumbling as I listened to his Godism lecture. At the same time my pride was damaged severely. When I listened to Godism, I thought it was a dream, but it was not. Then a beam of light came into my heart like a red-hot bullet. After moving through the air with the light, I came to see a miserable scene. I thought it likely that I was in Hell. Then I heard a voice saying, `Look at that. The poor children of God are groaning here. Save them. Be responsible for them. God is the Parent of all human beings.'

My whole body was covered with sweat, as if it had been raining. I saw a very miserable scene. My chest was choking and was in such pain that I couldn't stand it. I told Dr. Lee what I experienced. Dr. Lee said, `That's your responsibility. Think it over. After my experience of God's light, I have felt God always with me. Dr. Lee opened a new theoretical perspective to me.

All the thinkers in this cosmos! I, Marx, have met God. I have found that He is the Parent of humankind. I have felt the greatness of God's love. I clearly convey to you who God is. He is the Parent of humankind. Reverend Sun Myung Moon, who is on the Earth, brought this fact to light. The Divine Principle and Unification Thought express the original standards that open the way to salvation, so you must read them. I ask this of you seriously. I clearly say that I apologize for my past to God and True Parents and love them and am proud of them.

Marx, April 18, 2002.

New Age bullshit generator

Corporate bullshit generator.