express your repressed insecurities at their behaviour by making idle threats out of earshot? 
Workplace Quotes of the Day
"My friends kill gay people bruv. Seriously though. This guy pinched my mates arse an he beat him to death."
[what is your problem with being gay?]
"its disgusting. Thats two men SHAGGING, fucking each other up the arse! Thats not natural."
[but straight people do anal - haven't you tried that with a girl?]
"But... its... Look, would you fuck a man? No. Exa... what...? You'd fuck a man?!"
[standardly]
same guy
"have you heard of DJ EZ? He's the highest paid DJ in the world bruv, seriously though. The highest paid in the world, seriously. I'm going to see him on friday at [some out of town shit rave]"
[me] mate i don't think this guy is the highest paid DJ i haven't even heard of him and he's playing a garage rave in chingford. I think its probably Tiesto now, it was paul oakenfold for a bit about 5 years ago -
"No bruv. Its DJ Ee-Zed. I'm telling you"
other gut a 7 day adeventist and lovely chap:
"no first everyone dies and thats it you are dead. But on judgement day jesus brings everybody back to life and we are judged and if we have not sinned we go to heaven, and then we live forever."
[me] Can we have kids in heaven?
"of course!"
[me] and can ourt kids grow up and have kids?
"...yes."
[me] and their kids can have kids? and they live forever too? Thats a logistical nightmare. An ever increasing immortal population. Jesus.
"(laughter)"
Volin wrote:
When we were having a break, watching the news on the Royal Mail strike,"Greedy bastards! I'd be more than happy with what they earn and the rise they're getting isn't good enough for them. It's not as if it's a hard job..." etc.
to be fair, a -2% 'rise' is pretty extravagant, i haven't had a rise like that in years
Quote:
What do you do in this situation?
Choices, choices....
a) give the homaphobes a jolly good spanking
b) make a pass at them
c) inform them that only real closet queers have such a big hard on for gay blokes
d) take out a grievance for discrimination
e) just pull his arm off and hit him with the soggy end
I feel an anecdote coming on here... I used to work for a London council where I received anonymous poison pen letters referring not only to my being a lazy fucker who wouldn't even pick up a pencil without say so from the union, but which also went on and on about me being a "namby pamby queer" and "homo this and homo that," etc. I could never prove who had sent the letters but I was 75% sure it was a two-faced shitbag called J. One day, I spotted this J wandering in to a well known cottage on Hoxton market, so I followed him in and occupied the cubicle next door to him. Within two minutes, he shoves his little hard todger through the glory hole. So, what to do next? A real quandary??? The 75% of me who believed he was the poison pen wanted to grab hold and yank the bastard into the cubicle wall or maybe practice my skills at the karate chop. The 25% of me that was not sure he was the culprit thought that would be a tad harsh. So, I opted for shouting, "Hiya J, alright mate!" He was out of there like a shot and afterwards, at work, I would always wink and smile knowingly at him. He would always look like a scared rabbit when I did this. Funnily enough, I never received any more anonymous letters.
Serge Forward wrote:
Quote:
What do you do in this situation?Choices, choices....
a) give the homaphobes a jolly good spanking
b) make a pass at them
c) inform them that only real closet queers have such a big hard on for gay blokes
d) take out a grievance for discrimination
e) just pull his arm off and hit him with the soggy endI feel an anecdote coming on here... I used to work for a London council where I received anonymous poison pen letters referring not only to my being a lazy fucker who wouldn't even pick up a pencil without say so from the union, but which also went on and on about me being a "namby pamby queer" and "homo this and homo that," etc. I could never prove who had sent the letters but I was 75% sure it was a two-faced shitbag called J. One day, I spotted this J wandering in to a well known cottage on Hoxton market, so I followed him in and occupied the cubicle next door to him. Within two minutes, he shoves his little hard todger through the glory hole. So, what to do next? A real quandary??? The 75% of me who believed he was the poison pen wanted to grab hold and yank the bastard into the cubicle wall or maybe practice my skills at the karate chop. The 25% of me that was not sure he was the culprit thought that would be a tad harsh. So, I opted for shouting, "Hiya J, alright mate!" He was out of there like a shot and afterwards, at work, I would always wink and smile knowingly at him. He would always look like a scared rabbit when I did this. Funnily enough, I never received any more anonymous letters.
haha, brilliant
Seriously from this oxygen-theifs first opening statement, he sounds like someone who'd only gaybash the skinniest, smallest campest guy he could find, and only with a mate to back him up and boast to him with.
If it wasn't dishonerable, I'd add to my list of reasons why I learn Martial Arts the fact that I could offer any homophobes outside as it were....
I worked at a bar that was one of the first "gay friendly" in a new generations places to hang out. So there were plenty of (especially) lesbian couples who frequented.
One evening I overheard two really stupid frat dude types laughing at the dykes, etc. So after the evening, and they left a 50$ tip on a $19 tab (15 years ago!) I was fed up. So as they were getting up to leave I said that I was proud that gay couples like themselves could come out of the closet and enjoy themselves in public and said they were always welcome back. They gave eachother the weirdest look and walked out seperately.
Quote:
he sounds like someone who'd only gaybash the skinniest, smallest campest guy he could find, and only with a mate to back him up and boast to him with.
Ha ha. Coz that's so much worse than bashing a big hard gay bloke all on your own. If you're going to do it at all, you may as well take the most rewarding option.
Quote:
If it wasn't dishonerable…
Ha ha. Ha ha ha. I love it. I really do. Trustworthiness and social status. Yes, camp people need your protection.
Quote:
What do you do in this situation?
It depends on what you want to achieve out of the situation. Honour?
meh working in brighton i almost miss homophobia, makes me feel nostalgic
guydebordisdead wrote:
The entire concept of 'honour' in relation to fighting is macho crap. There's only winning and losing, how you get to the end point is your own business.
jesus you sound like jean claude van damme pretending to be a zen guru
guydebordisdead wrote:
The entire concept of 'honour' in relation to fighting is macho crap. There's only winning and losing, how you get to the end point is your own business.
i've always felt that the matter of honour lies in *why* you fight, not so much how you fight (though there are exceptions, like using/hurting innocents for your gain). thrashing chomsky didnt mention honour in the fight, it was more honour of why s/he would fight. and there was still some sense in chomsky saying it was dishonourable, imo.
(*cough* i'm a total geek, one of those "top five books that changed how you think" was a small little book on samurai i read when i was in elementary school 
)
My all-time fave is a driver describing someone as "a paki from Botswana". Also priceless was this exchange:
Thick colleague: Are you reading a book?
Nice colleague: Yes.
TC: Why?
Sigh.
I remember when a Chinese guy accidentally left the tap on in the gents and the security guard said "it shows what they're like". Yes, China is permanently under 10 feet of water. 
"The other day I was at the cell phone store and I saw these two faggots walk out the door and kiss eachother. I should've taken my knife and slit their throats."
&
"I was driving down the street by [Well Known Homosexual Coffeshop] and saw a group of four guys walking accross the street holding hands. I was with my kid, and he was staring at them. I was going to ask him what he thought, but I forgot. Either way, I should've just hit the motherfuckers."
What do you do in this situation?