Funniest thing you read today

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Craftwork's picture
Craftwork
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Mar 13 2017 19:42

According to Turkish media, police in the Netherlands ("Holland") threw an atom bomb at Turkish protesters...

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Entdinglichung
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Mar 15 2017 11:07

https://workersspatula.wordpress.com/2017/03/11/news-in-brief-march-11th-2017/

Quote:
BRIGHTON, ENGLAND – Local teenage Marxist Frank Hobbes has elected to join the SPGB, making him the first young person to join the party in decades.
petey
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Mar 20 2017 21:02

nothing to do with politics.

Quote:
THERE were tense scenes at today’s weigh-in for Conor McGregor’s upcoming first child, as the spirited foetus squared up to the doctor performing his ultrasound, reportedly telling him to ‘get that fuckin’ thing out of my face’.

...

Swimming in amniotic fluid with the same swagger and attitude as Conor, the utero-weight champion went on a rant that would make his dad proud, stating in no uncertain terms that he wasn’t here to be poked and prodded at by ‘some prick who couldn’t make it as a real doctor’..

http://waterfordwhispersnews.com/2017/02/20/mcgregors-baby-in-heated-stand-off-during-ultrasound/

potrokin
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Mar 25 2017 13:59

Drunk Alex Jones
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=11ODY-E-S7g

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Reddebrek
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Mar 24 2017 04:53
Entdinglichung's picture
Entdinglichung
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Mar 24 2017 09:35

https://video.vice.com/alps/video/alex-jones-scream-master/58cb1210e467a7553fe50e89?latest_videos=1

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Entdinglichung
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Mar 25 2017 08:52

https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/ecosexuals-believe-having-sex-with-the-earth-could-save-it?utm_source=vicefbanz&utm_campaign=global

potrokin
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Mar 25 2017 13:58

Info Derps

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=63EOeQ_H_Eo

potrokin
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Mar 26 2017 18:52

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xVUyQC7AE0Q

potrokin
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Mar 28 2017 13:06

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yar_WHZIaHs

potrokin
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Mar 29 2017 14:48

http://newsthump.com/2017/03/29/nigel-farage-to-spend-article-50-day-bending-bananas-in-tesco/

http://newsthump.com/2017/03/29/civilisation-just-a-phase-confirm-experts/

http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/politics/politics-headlines/arseholed-nick-clegg-screams-filth-at-a-pigeon-20170329125103

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Mar 30 2017 20:24

Soviet police memo to determine a Soviet citizen's national origin.
Top: Russian, Ukrainian, Tatar, Jew, Gypsy, Kyrgyz
Middle: Belorussian, Lithuanian, Georgian, Armenian, Kazakh, Uzbek
Bottom: Latvian, Estonian, Azerbaijani, Moldavian, Tajik, Turkmen

Fleur
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Mar 31 2017 02:19

Hastings man confused about 11th century governance.
https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2017/mar/29/brexit-battle-hastings-norman-conquest-article-50

Quote:
Joy proudly tells of how his family goes back all the way to Hastings in the 11th century. “The concept of being governed by an unelected body would have been absolutely abhorrent to anyone in those days. It’s almost like the state has been lost. It was like another takeover, we relinquished our law and power to an unelected body,” he says .

Someone should gently break it to Mr Joy, 68, that hereditary monarchy was not exactly a mandate from the masses.

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Mar 31 2017 12:10

<script async src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script>

<script async src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script>

potrokin
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Mar 31 2017 17:54

http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/business/wetherspoons-impossible-to-boycott-20170331125239

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Mar 31 2017 19:27
Fleur wrote:
Hastings man confused about 11th century governance.
https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2017/mar/29/brexit-battle-hastings-norman-conquest-article-50
Quote:
Joy proudly tells of how his family goes back all the way to Hastings in the 11th century. “The concept of being governed by an unelected body would have been absolutely abhorrent to anyone in those days. It’s almost like the state has been lost. It was like another takeover, we relinquished our law and power to an unelected body,” he says .

Someone should gently break it to Mr Joy, 68, that hereditary monarchy was not exactly a mandate from the masses.

To be fair though, the pre-norman kings weren't strictly hereditary but had to be ratified by the Witan council. The last Saxon king Harold was actually elected. None of this stops that bloke from Hastings being a tad deluded, mind you.

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Mar 31 2017 20:03

British teacher locked-up in China forced to watch Nicolas Cage films.

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/british-teacher-locked-up-china-10131819

cactus9
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Apr 1 2017 02:30
Craftwork wrote:
British teacher locked-up in China forced to watch Nicolas Cage films.

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/british-teacher-locked-up-china-10131819

"He has no immediate plans to return to China".

At first I was like, no, that's gonna be too dark but the article is indeed quite funny.

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Craftwork
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Apr 1 2017 14:22

petey
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Apr 1 2017 14:27

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Entdinglichung
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Apr 3 2017 08:33

not really funny: https://twitter.com/georgegalloway/status/846693002571644928

from George the Cat:

Quote:
"I'll fight for a Peoples Brexit, an end to "free movement of labour" from the EU. British jobs with Commonwealth preference in immigration."

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Entdinglichung
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Apr 4 2017 12:26

Craftwork's picture
Craftwork
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Apr 4 2017 15:46

Chimpanzee throws faeces at old woman.

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Apr 5 2017 13:39

<script async src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script>

wojtek
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Apr 8 2017 07:55

https://youtu.be/odCBml5TuNI

Craftwork's picture
Craftwork
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Apr 9 2017 10:22

Reddebrek's picture
Reddebrek
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Apr 9 2017 15:43

BREAKING: Revolutionary, head of #Bolshevik party @VLenin_1917 has left his exile in Zurich, en route to #Petrograd #1917LIVE #LeninTracker pic.twitter.com/t1kMxNvFid

— Russian Telegraph (@RT_1917) April 9, 2017

<script asyncsrc="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script>

Fleur
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Apr 9 2017 16:38

I regret to inform you that Louise is at it again.
https://twitter.com/LouiseMensch/status/851044052044845056

For those without the twitters and I don't know how to embed tweets -

Quote:
That's because you, Russia, funded riots in Ferguson. See 0 hour I have your connections to Trump archived via Schiller and Scavino

Translation: Louise Mensch has slipped entirely down the Trump is an agent of Russia conspiracy rabbithole, (Dan Scavino is his social media manager, Keith Schiller is his bodyguard, head of security,) the Ferguson riots was funded by Russia, BLM being orchestrated Russia.

Louise Mensch, weirdly fascinating. I'm wondering if it might be worthwhile to read her novels, she certainly has a fevered imagination.

petey
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Apr 9 2017 16:45
Reddebrek wrote:
BREAKING: Revolutionary, head of #Bolshevik party @VLenin_1917 has left his exile in Zurich, en route to #Petrograd #1917LIVE #LeninTracker pic.twitter.com/t1kMxNvFid— Russian Telegraph (@RT_1917) April 9, 2017

that graphic is hilarious.
good twitter, have bookmarked.

Fleur wrote:
I regret to inform you that Louise is at it again.

grin

potrokin
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Apr 11 2017 09:18

http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/politics/politics-headlines/edl-quietly-goes-back-to-being-a-carp-fishing-syndicate-20170410125738