Congratulations Kate and Billy

Organise! would like to extend our official congratulations to Britain’s most famous sweethearts, Kate Middleton and Prince Billy.
Oh, I suppose that you all expected us to say something about the cost of the do to working-class people, and get on like big boring grumps, but we’re of the opinion that nothing should get in the way of a good party, not even a financial crisis. Even if it is the most expensive security event in Britain. Ever.
Sure, the MET are so skint that they’ve sent a letter to David Cameron pleading with him to help them out with the cost of getting thousands of cops out of their beds on a bank holiday to police the event, but so what? A couple more A&E closures should sort that right out.
We’re a bit hurt that we didn’t get an invite, but we’re blaming cuts in the postal service. Or maybe they were a bit scared that we’d turn up and make a scene, given that “anarchist groups, Irish and Islamic terrorists and lone individuals with mental problems” are topping the cop list of ne’er do wells to look out for on the 29th. Presumably the last group on that list include pissed-off workers who begrudge paying for the wedding after being systematically raped up the arse by government austerity measures, but they’re just not getting into the spirit of things. I mean, what’s £20 million between friends?
Organise! unfortunately can’t attend the event anyway, given that none of us can afford the plane fare. But we’ll raise a glass to the happy couple on the 30th during the May Day celebrations instead, and ask our comrades over the water to say hello to them for us on the day. Hell, we might even buy a commemorative tea-towel from the pound shop. Cos after all, it’s not every day that we all get to be collectively fucked over so blatantly and be told we have to not only like it, but pay for it as well. Oh, wait....